Driving in Bangalore – Tips for staying ahead

I purchased and drove my first motorized vehicle when we were expecting our first baby. It was a four wheeler – a 2002 model of Fiat Palio. In the early days, I found driving around the city of Bangalore to be quite taxing.  Over time though, I have grown a liking for driving helped largely by a few guidelines that I have evolved for myself. For folks who are yet to master the art, here are a few tips that should sustain you as you discover the joy of driving in Bangalore.

Tip #1 Traffic signals are meant to be guidelines – Beginners should start at the begining. Treat traffic signals as though they are guidelines. They are not necessarily to be followed. Just ensure that there is no traffic cop around when you apply this tip. This can be quite difficult to practice because traffic cops at some of the intersections make it a point to hide themselves. One has to scan the intersection from a distance to decide whether to follow the tip or not. Following this tip shaves off at least 2 minutes from your journey time without involving any significant risk.

Tip #2 All left turns are free left – This is a special case of Tip #1 .Every left turn is a free left even when stated otherwise. Irrespective of which way the traffic is moving, just  feel free to merge with it. One of my creative friends calls this the perpendicular merge.  Avoid merging with oncoming traffic, though. It can be quite dangerous to mess with oncoming traffic and is to be practised only when you have mastered the basic ones. Following this tip will save you 30 seconds per “non-free” left turn.

Tip #3 Drive as though you own the road – In the early days of my driving experience, I would make a conscious effort to steer clear of every vehicle around me. As a result, I would always be driving the car in second gear to the utter dismay of my fellow drivers . Upon some reflection, I realized that I was paying the price for being a nice guy. Now I just try and take care of myself. In fact I figured out that every one else is trying to do the same. The result is that everyone is taken care of and you do not need to bother about anyone. The result can be quite staggering and can cut down your travel time by a good 1/5th.

Tip #4 You always have the right of way – This is surprisingly true. All that you need to do is never make eye contact while negotiating the right of way. Again, during my early days of driving, I would almost always have to give way to an auto driver or the BPO cab driver. It was a mystery to me until one day I realized that if you do not look at the other person, you don’t know that he exists – in other words you can’t give him or her the right of way. Since then my life on the road has improved considerably. The best way to execute this is to look right down in front of you, occasionally scanning the surrounding with the corner of  your eye. My success rate with this methodology has been close to 99.5%. This can be as rewarding as Tip #3 above, if done right.

Tip #5 Driving on the wrong side of the road is legal – If you need to cross over but find a median in between, don’t waste your time and fuel driving to the next break in the median before taking a U-turn. Just keep driving on the wrong side of the road until you find a break in the median and then cut across to join the traffic on the right side. Make sure you have your hazard lights on when doing this. Otherwise it can be extremely dangerous for fellow drivers. This is what one of my friends calls reverse merge ie driving in the reverse direction before merging with the traffic going your way. This is more risky than most of the tips mentioned above. But it can be yield very good results, particularly near flyovers where the medians runs for kilometers together.

Now that  you have a few tips under your belt, happy driving. If none of the tips mentioned here work for you, your best bet might be to roll down the window, stick out your hand, stare at your fellow drivers, throw the choicest four letter words at them and keep driving.

 

Disclaimer: None of the views expressed here are owned by the author. The author explicitly disowns any and all liability arising out of following or disregarding the  tips presented here.

Feeling secure in an IT Park…

India is developing rapidly. Malls, apartments, cars are all mushrooming like aliens in a Spielberg movie. Economic growth rates of 9.5% get a passing mention in the newspaper. The number of flights and trains between Tier-2 and semi-urban cities is growing exponentially.  Everything around us seems to be growing and so is the number of security personnel.

I work at a US multinational corporation in one of the many swanky office buildings in Bangalore. Technology park is a common euphemism for the imposing and unsightly structure of concrete, steel and glass that have mushroomed across the city. Many years ago, I once unsuccessfully tried locating a park in these complexes. But I am digressing.

The Technology Park houses at least a dozen companies employing upwards of 5000 employees. Managing the traffic surge in mornings and evenings is a challenge at the best of times.  However, the security personnel at the Park have turned traffic management and security into an art. So much so that I actually look forward to the experience everyday.

Initially, I used to come early to work, by Bangalore standards that is, and would get undivided attention from 90% of the welcome staff at the entrance. They all descended on me at the same time – like arrows in Ramananda Sagar’s epic TV serial Ramayana – directing me to go in conflicting directions. While I did not mind the attention, it started getting embarrassing after a while. Now-a-days, I make it a point to come to office only during peak hours.  No one notices me. Everyone is too busy inspecting car boots.

For some unfathomable reason, or perhaps not so unfathomable reason, the security personnel religiously scan the boots of all self-driven cars. It is unclear why the cabs are left alone. Perhaps there is nothing valuable or harmful that can possibly be sneaked in by these cab drivers.

Past the security checkpost, I ease into the basement parking. The security guard posted at the entrance of the parking lot waits for me to turn on my left indicator before he indicates which way I should turn.  

I go over three speed breakers, chunks of concrete with a semi-circular cross section laid across the driveway, before I get to my parking lot. Yet another security person greets me in the parking lot, whose primary responsibility seems to be jotting down car numbers. “One of these days I must ask him the motivation behind jotting numbers”, I make a mental note to myself.

By now, I feel totally secure. I wait for the elevator to take me up to the 10th floor, when another security guard appears out of nowhere like Aladdin’s genie. “Can I check your bag, saar”, he asks me in impeccable English. Surprised I hand him my bag, which he turns over and returns me promptly with a “Thank you, saar”.  “What are you looking for”, I ask him unable to resist the curiosity,  “I don’t know”,  comes the reply.  By then, the elevator doors open and I jump in,  feeling completely safe and secure.